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Anthony
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Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Wed Mar 21, 2012 5:14 pm

Thanks Ashlee.

We did pretty much what you said, united front and all that. Told him how it was and that if it goes on, he's the one who will have to move out because we're not. We can find a replacement. He seemed to get the idea but I could tell from the stupid smile on his face that maybe he just doesn't get it. He's completely changed and at this point I just don't care anymore.

Him moving out and everything going crap was the last thing I wanted. My other housemate and I have agreed to see how it goes over the next week now that he has said he understands the issue and if it gets better; maybe it will be fine. If not, he'll have to go.

:)
 
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starbugger1303
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Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Mon Mar 26, 2012 12:08 am

After a great weekend, its back to reality tommorow.

Roll on Friday so I can do it all again!

:D
 
Ripsaw Raver
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Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Mon Mar 26, 2012 2:51 pm

My partner cheated on my about a week ago and yesterday said he Loves me but hes not in love with me and that when we have any sexual attraction he feel guilty towards the lad he cheated on me with...i dont wana leave him, ive been with him just over 3 years now but i feel so empty at the moment almost like i dont even know who i am anymore.=[
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Rowe

Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Mon Mar 26, 2012 4:37 pm

Ripsaw Raver wrote:
My partner cheated on my about a week ago and yesterday said he Loves me but hes not in love with me and that when we have any sexual attraction he feel guilty towards the lad he cheated on me with...i dont wana leave him, ive been with him just over 3 years now but i feel so empty at the moment almost like i dont even know who i am anymore.=[


That's very sad and unfortunate to hear :(

Think of the situation like this, albeit cliche: Would you ever trust him again and would you both put in the effort to make the relationship work again?

Considering how empty you feel inside because of this and the fact he has done nothing to right his wrongs except feeling guilty when it comes to sex, it would be unfair for you to stay with him any longer. He's made you unhappy with no excuse to his actions, conscious or not, and breached the trust in the relationship causing you undeserved misery; Would you really want to endure that painful knowledge if you were to stay?

It would be better to leave him now and make a fresh start, even if you don't want to, out of your own happiness rather than be stuck in a loveless relationship with an unfaithful partner.
 
Jem8472
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Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Mon Mar 26, 2012 5:07 pm

Good reply Rowe.

People generally suck.

If he says he does not love you then I think its over. So it would best for you to try and move on. I dont know if you have thought about it but it might be worth trying to go to a relate counsellor. Me and my wife have been a few times.It might also be good just for you to go and talk to someone. They are good at what they do.

Also if he cheated make sure you go and get yourself tested for STDs.

But we are trying very hard to work through this and it seems to be going ok.

But I still have really rubbish days and I want to go and smash this guy around he head with something large and heavy. It still might happen I cant rule it out.

PM me if you want.

Edited the post again  :oops: I know its sort of out of the bag but bit silly to post it I was just in a bad mood earlier
Last edited by Jem8472 on Mon Mar 26, 2012 6:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.
 
Anthony
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Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Mon Mar 26, 2012 6:04 pm

Hey man, it takes stones to make something private into public knowledge; especially purely to help someone else out with their troubles.

In other news, I got a sucky mark on my last essay. It's my own fault, I just hate research so much. The Israel/Palestine conflict I have realised is too big for me. I just struggle so much with battles of identity because, well, I don't really have one. There is nothing in this world that important to me as the land is to them. Suck as well because though I've realised this, I still have another essay and an exam to go on the topic!!

:yikes:
 
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starbugger1303
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Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Wed Mar 28, 2012 4:13 pm

 
Poison Tom 96

Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Wed Mar 28, 2012 10:23 pm

Ripsaw I have helped other TTFers before and if you want to talk I am here. PM me......

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formula1fan

Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Fri Mar 30, 2012 12:39 pm

I discovered a few minutes ago that the headteacher at my former school is retiring after about 22 years of being Deputy Head and Head. He turned the school around into much more of a success, and presided over several construction projects - an extension to the Humanities block, refurbishment of classrooms and the PE changing rooms, a Sports Centre, to name but a few. Also, it was under his leadership that the school had a brand new build, which opened for academic use in September 2011. I did see this coming - I think I said to my driving instructor (who is also a support worker at the school for children with learning difficulties) that I thought Mr Bell (the headteacher) would retire one academic year after seeing the school move from the old build to the new one. It turns out that I was right, which freaked me out a little bit. Opinions of him differ, but I had a lot of respect for him. And I still do. Whilst I saw this news coming, it still shocked me. He's done so much for the school, and he will be missed by many. :(
 
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NastyPasty
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Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Fri Mar 30, 2012 2:16 pm

That's a lovely sentiment to have  :D

I'm sure he would be thrilled that people view him so highly and he'll be able to retire in peace knowing that he's had a great impact on his community. Through your disappointment in his retirement just there you've automatically proved that he is a great teacher, and although it is sad to see people move on, he can't be selfless 24/7 and at some point there's always going to have to be change. Just one of those things.

Ok, never done this before, but might as well.

Before people begin to launch their missiles about what a spoiled brat I am, attending a private school and having what would appear to be a fairly charmed life, I should explain that I'm on scholarship, which means I receive a massive 75% off my school fees. There is not way my family could afford to send me without this huge reduction as we struggle as it is (no holiday in 6 years and limited expenses). I'm in Year 10 and am having what I believe to be puberty's answer to a midlife crisis  :|
Everyday I wake up and feel totally obliterated before the day has begun. I suffer from insomnia which doesn't help, although I constantly feel exhausted completely regardless of my sleep. My grades are slipping, as is my interest. All I want to do is mess around and waste time, and my results are supporting this. I feel often very immature (I'm only 1.53m, I have the voice of a chain-smoking grandma on helium and lack the vast quantities of hair that engulf my peers). I just feel like I've hit a dead end and I'm fed up of the usual "you'll come out of it" talk. My parents constantly spy on me and check every little detail of my life; no privacy allowed.

Is there any advice for when I feel low that I can take from these forums?

Thanks in advance.
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Big Dave

Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Fri Mar 30, 2012 7:54 pm

Just came this close >< to handing my notice in. Work is really taking the piss now and are threatening people who disagree with them. My 3 hr shift on friday has become 5 hours, but I wont get paid for the extra hours. Basically my bus sometimes gets me to work 3mins late, but now they are saying I have got to get the earlier bus. Thing is I normally make it up to them by staying several mins later. Really pissing me off

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Last edited by Big Dave on Fri Mar 30, 2012 7:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.
 
Poison Tom 96

Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Fri Mar 30, 2012 8:46 pm

NastyPasty wrote:
That's a lovely sentiment to have  :D

I'm sure he would be thrilled that people view him so highly and he'll be able to retire in peace knowing that he's had a great impact on his community. Through your disappointment in his retirement just there you've automatically proved that he is a great teacher, and although it is sad to see people move on, he can't be selfless 24/7 and at some point there's always going to have to be change. Just one of those things.

Ok, never done this before, but might as well.

Before people begin to launch their missiles about what a spoiled brat I am, attending a private school and having what would appear to be a fairly charmed life, I should explain that I'm on scholarship, which means I receive a massive 75% off my school fees. There is not way my family could afford to send me without this huge reduction as we struggle as it is (no holiday in 6 years and limited expenses). I'm in Year 10 and am having what I believe to be puberty's answer to a midlife crisis  :|
Everyday I wake up and feel totally obliterated before the day has begun. I suffer from insomnia which doesn't help, although I constantly feel exhausted completely regardless of my sleep. My grades are slipping, as is my interest. All I want to do is mess around and waste time, and my results are supporting this. I feel often very immature (I'm only 1.53m, I have the voice of a chain-smoking grandma on helium and lack the vast quantities of hair that engulf my peers). I just feel like I've hit a dead end and I'm fed up of the usual "you'll come out of it" talk. My parents constantly spy on me and check every little detail of my life; no privacy allowed.

Is there any advice for when I feel low that I can take from these forums?

Thanks in advance.

First advice is PM me if you need me.

Second is tell your parents to back off. they have no right to do what they are doing monitoring you 24/7

Thirdly see you doctor about sleeping problems and then you will feel less obliterated

And Puberty can't be helped :P

Big Dave wrote:
Just came this close >< to handing my notice in. Work is really taking the piss now and are threatening people who disagree with them. My 3 hr shift on friday has become 5 hours, but I wont get paid for the extra hours. Basically my bus sometimes gets me to work 3mins late, but now they are saying I have got to get the earlier bus. Thing is I normally make it up to them by staying several mins later. Really pissing me off

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Dave you are either going to have to put up with it or Speak out and threaten your job.

I would strongly advise talking to people on here who have been in this situation before.
 
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pluk
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Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Fri Mar 30, 2012 11:08 pm

Big Dave wrote:
Just came this close >< to handing my notice in. Work is really taking the piss now and are threatening people who disagree with them. My 3 hr shift on friday has become 5 hours, but I wont get paid for the extra hours. Basically my bus sometimes gets me to work 3mins late, but now they are saying I have got to get the earlier bus. Thing is I normally make it up to them by staying several mins later. Really pissing me off

Sent from my X10i using Tapatalk


That's all sorts of not legal. Tell them they pay you or you don't stay on, let them try and discipline you for going home on time and see how far they get. Who do you work for?

EDIT - Or are you saying you've got to get a 2hr earlier bus? In which case, unlucky. They don't sound like great people to work for though.
Last edited by pluk on Fri Mar 30, 2012 11:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Dar

Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Sat Mar 31, 2012 10:23 pm

pluk wrote:
Big Dave wrote:
Just came this close >< to handing my notice in. Work is really taking the piss now and are threatening people who disagree with them. My 3 hr shift on friday has become 5 hours, but I wont get paid for the extra hours. Basically my bus sometimes gets me to work 3mins late, but now they are saying I have got to get the earlier bus. Thing is I normally make it up to them by staying several mins later. Really pissing me off

Sent from my X10i using Tapatalk


That's all sorts of not legal. Tell them they pay you or you don't stay on, let them try and discipline you for going home on time and see how far they get. Who do you work for?

EDIT - Or are you saying you've got to get a 2hr earlier bus? In which case, unlucky. They don't sound like great people to work for though.


I know who it is, I used to work for another branch! :(

Dave, is it unpaid to be taken in lieu? My only advice is to read your contract, your PM may breathe fire and smoke at the ears but it's all bull if it's not in your contract!! I know from some conversations I overheard ;)

That and join the union, if you haven't already, and USE them! My old reps were really good and wouldn't stand for any poop from personnel!

On a personal note, if you don't owe them time, if you haven't been paid for the times you were late or you fulfilled your contracted hours another way, tell them to get shafted on the longest, thickest pole you can find. If I remember correctly, you would be contracted for X hours a week, with no mention of when they take place, so as long as you have done those hours they can't do anything. You may get a disciplinary for the continued lateness though. :(
 
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RustyRider
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Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Mon Apr 02, 2012 11:26 pm

I've just made the hardest decision of my life, I'm finding it really hard to put into words on here, it's such an awkward situation, I'll try and explain from the beginning...

Back in November 2008 I met the girl of my dreams and we both quickly fell in love with each other, she the. Found out she was pregnant in January, at 22 weeks gone... It obviously wasn't my child, my initial reaction was to get the f*#k out of there, but I didn't care because by that time we were already in love, he was born on march 18 one month early.

I knew he wasn't mine but I just loved him to bits and bizarrely, he looked like me...

Image

Things were going great, we went on holidays together, went everywhere together and were a very happy family.. Things started to go wrong when I got a job as a barman, jealousy kicked in and she stopped trusting me, started accusing me of sleeping with staff and customers (!!) alike. It was getting ridiculous.

I told her if the accusations don't stop then I would leave, they continued so I broke it off 2 months ago after 3 years 2 months. We both decided it would be good if I stayed in my sons life, after all I'd been there since the very beginning (I even cut the cord, knowing he wasn't mine), so I am his father and I have raised him. Things were going well, I'd pick him up from nursery on Tuesday's and have him overnight and all day Wednesday, then take him back to nursery on Thursday.

However, things have been going very sour very quickly, telling me that I won't be able to see him anymore if you take him anywhere other than Weston, just generally using him as a weapon to get what she needs from me, money etc...

Tonight I've made the very tough decision to stop seeing my son as I can't have her in my life anymore, she's making me very depressed and it's affecting my work life, I love him so so much and I will miss him an incredible amount, but ultimately he isnt my son, so when she finally finds another man he will have 3 dads, which is very confusing for someone his age. Hopefully he wont remember me to be too upset later on in life, but I know I've been a huge part of his life, he's an incredible kid, so well behaved and I hope he goes on to do great things....I'm seeing him for the last time in Wednesday...  :( :( :(
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badger

Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Tue Apr 03, 2012 3:22 pm

I know that it might seem like a cliche, but it is easy to be a father, difficult to be a dad. You were a Dad.
Your decision to build your relationship with your ex and become a dad, was right for you all (at that time) and shows how incredibly strong you are. The situation has deteriorated, and again you needed to make a decision. Again, I think that your decision has been the best one, for all involved.
It must hurt.... but be sure that you have been a good Dad. One day, I'm sure that you will be a great dad again, and I wish you all the best wishes that I can muster.
 
Poison Tom 96

Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Tue Apr 03, 2012 4:01 pm

Having never been in this situation all i can do is :hug:
 
Georgiaa

Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Wed Apr 04, 2012 5:05 pm

Anticipated a trip to Alton today for months.. and as you probably know it had closed due to weather and power cuts.

Gutted! :(
 
Poison Tom 96

Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Wed Apr 04, 2012 5:20 pm

Unlucky Georgia :/

You have to go soon to renew your Merlin though hint hint......
 
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James
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Re: The 'I Feel Down' Topic

Wed Apr 04, 2012 5:49 pm

Not a 'feeling down' post from me, more of a 'I'm really angry' post. I'm really furious with certain people right now which have just suddenly blocked me off completely. No longer talking to me whatsoever, and even when I try to talk I get one or two worded answers with nothing to add.

If there's one thing I hate in people, it's ignorance. Some people have pushed the line with me this time.

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